I cried so much last night.... SIGH.... Dunno why my heart do hurts......but it feels numb as well... i pity myself for it... really.....eugene... are u moving on? when can u change the picture in ur wallet?Sigh... i dunno.... whenever i took out my wallet... all i thought was you again... n the pics that u gave me for my wallet.... sigh...Even the wallet itself.. is you bought for me de....Arghhhh..... izzit time to change? ppl ask me to change it.. or even just dun put anything...but i cun ans them now.... i just kept silent or just sigh... actually im really trying my best to move on le... but the pain is just still there....hai... Sometimes i wonder do u really love me after all.... because you left me when i needed you the most.... really the most....and you are attach the next min..... sooo fast.....tat means.. i was really being two time...SIGH....WHY YOU GAL? WHY?????....whenever i thought of you....i saw flash back of me working sooo hard in sch.... looking at your friendster in the middle of the night while im doing my work... msg you whenever i thought of u... going for seminar... and your msg matters the most to me... called u but u didnt really pick up during those times... Sigh.....I really pity myself you know.... after all... i didnt flirt when i left you alone during those times... i was doing my final year project for god sake~~~ and working sooo hard in order i could get good results so that i could get a good job... and i could support you.... let you rest more at home... no need to feel so tired and work sooo hard everyday at work......Sigh....why can't you even wait a little longer? *sobz.... its too late to apologize my dear.... because what is done has been done... You broke my heart.... it hurts n cause a deep impact on me... u ask me to forget u....... can i? how do u expect me to forget someone tat i ever loved and gave soo much? Sigh...still remember there was once when its raining... i still cook and bring to your house give you.... i open the umbrella for u..to get down the bus.. and feed you when you are eating...those moments are sooo sweet... just soo sweet... no matter how tired i am... whenever u are angry... i tried my very very best to make you hapy again n again... and i never ever complain at all.... because i know i love you more than anything else in this world... sigh....But now i am left with no option u know... ITS LIKE IVE BEEN FORCE TO LET U GO...... AND NOW WAT IS LEFT BEHIND ARE ALL THE MEMORIES OF YOU AND ME....eugene they all keep telling me that they saw u n him together.....holding hands all tat... although i tried soo hard not to think about it... but i still felt angry... n sad....soo damn bloody sad u know.......arghhhhh.... i just felt like shouting out loud... KAREEN TAN!!! WHY TREAT ME LIKE TAT???? WHY GAVE ME SOOO MANY PROMISES BUT YOU LEFT ME JUST LIKE TAT? HOW COULD YOU GET INTO A R/S SO FAST?HOW COULD YOU......REALLY......HOW COULD YOU......HEARTACHES...SIGH....i guess at tat point of time... i am not tat important anymore...you cun ans me whether you love him or not...or maybe you just dun wanna hurt me once more for telling me the truth... but i guess your decision has already told me the ans le... because you chose him over me.... and he took over what i once own.... sigh.... soo sad... n hurts sooo badly...it was mine once u knw...... n i thought you were really mine..... and just mine........*tears... i nv seen myself broke dwn soo hard at all... i have change to another person like what i ever told you...someone tat can't give wat i gave u to any other gals le.... it will be your first..... and my last time.. ever treating someone like tat....i promise not to give my pride or the love tat i ever gave you to them le.... because i really cun afford to be hurt again like tat.... the pain is really hurting me sooo much.....i know nothing is forever...for me atleast.. because after all... i cun give gals what they really want...... i guess its true tat bungs are just being remembered for the love we gave... but often not for who we really are....Sigh.....
Take care Gal...
I SHALL MOVE ON WITH MY LIFE...LIKE HOW U TOLD ME TO.....I'm trying...
*HEARTACHES.... :"""""(